Monday, 1 February 2016

Positivity Log: January 2016


Here’s the first in hopefully a long series of positive blogs, showcasing the highlights from my positivity diary for the month of January. I’ve picked a set of entries that were particularly salient to me, and I’m going to talk you through some of them:

Bought Mom some flowers as thanks for remaining positive over Christmas
This was one of the first entries to the diary, in fact made on the very day that I bought it. Most of you know I’ve been ill with depression over Christmas, and there were some other things going on as well that had the potential to make it a very difficult time for us indeed. In spite of all this, my Mom remained upbeat, positive and supportive all the way through it, and as I walked past a small flower shop in Stourbridge, I felt that some thanks were in order. So I bought her some flowers. What kind? Purple ones. I haven’t got a clue what the name of the plant was.

Went for a walk
This one does come up a lot. There are times when I get stuck in my own head, and the only way to get out of it again is to do something. Very often, this involves sticking on my CD player and going for a walk around Lower Gornal. It doesn’t necessarily always stop the negative thoughts, but at least I’ve done something with my evening, and I can feel positive about that.

Meeting an old friend
This one’s in two parts. It actually happened the second week into the New Year, where I went out for lunch with a couple of friends I knew at school. We’ve remained friends ever since, but because of the different directions our lives have taken over the last few years, we rarely see one another these days. Nonetheless, I can go out for lunch with those guys and it would be no different to if I’d seen them the previous week. It was so nice to see them again, and I hope we can make it a semi-regular thing for the future; it’s definitely conducive to feeling positive!
The second part happened the previous week. After a particularly tough weekend, I happened to look at my phone before I went to bed on the Sunday night, and saw the text message from my friend asking if I wanted to meet up the following Friday. Getting that message made me very happy indeed: for the first time in a very long time, I felt an involuntary grin spread across my face. Moments like that are the reason I started this diary in the first place. Let’s hope there’ll be many more.

John Lennon and Chuck Berry

A friend I know from the music scene shared a video of John Lennon and Chuck Berry playing Johnny B. Goode together on the Mike Douglas show. Now, I’m not a massive fan of either, but given all the musical legends that have passed away over the last month, moments like this should not be forgotten. Thanks for sharing!

Talked to my Sister about video games
Sometimes I’m amazed at how much common ground I have with my sister on video games, of all things. It’s always nice to sit down and talk about games we used to play when we were a lot younger, and get nostalgic about video games that just aren’t made like that anymore.
So, there you go: a selection of entries from the diary, let’s hope February is just as good!

Before I go, a note about how I’m getting on with the depression: I’m doing OK for now. I’ve reached a point where I’m behaving normally most of the time, and anything I’m dealing with in private is just that: private. I’ve become somewhat emotionally detached from the relevant situation; not an entirely positive statement but it means I can think clearly enough to be able to deal with it and I’m not tearing myself to pieces about it anymore. I don’t know how much it means that I’ve recognised it for what it is, but I’m in a better place now than I was a month ago.